When the Heat is On: Communicating Through Conflict

Outline

Topic 1: Start with Care

Time: 15 minutes

Content
This section will lay the groundwork for why when we care about others in our organization or educational community, we must share the information that will allow them to get better and to build stronger partnerships. We will examine the routines building and district leaders can put into place to show care regularly in order to lay the foundation for harder conversations. We also discuss briefly the significant impact the building or district leader has on the culture of their organization.

Engagement strategy and Process
Real life examples shared throughout from two practitioners
The use of a fun, fast paced approach with a good dose of humor
Peer-to-Peer interaction utilizing the brag and borrow technique in which participants share routines they use to establish relationships of care with the adults in their school community, or a new technique that we shared and how they plan to implement it in their context.

Topic 2: Relationship Formula: Listening + Dignity + Trust

Time: 20 Minutes

Content
Listening: Utilizing the why am I talking, why arn’t I talking (W.A.I.T.) technique, the language to use during escalation, being fully present, identifying the angst under the anger, getting clear on the issue to solve, applying Acknowledge, Validate, Coach, and utilizing a third point.

Dignity: Belonging vs. fitting in, strategies for learning about and celebrating the diverse backgrounds and cultures of the adults in our school communities, awareness of the power dynamics at play when leaders are talking to other educators in their system as well as community members.

Trust: We discuss the baseline for building trust including competence, integrity, intent, & results. We will also discuss what it means to be impeccable with your word, and how to leverage an apology.

Engagement strategy and Process
Real life examples shared throughout from two practitioners
The use of a fun, fast paced approach with a good dose of humor
Peer-to-Peer interaction utilizing a think pair share reflection based on the content in this section.

Topic 3: When the Heat is On

Time: 25 Minutes

Content:
In all difficult conversations we will discuss how to lead with curiosity, how to stay regulated, and how to de-escalate others. We will share techniques to use when the conversation is planned, including matching methods of communication to the purpose of the conversation, how to select a coaching stance, how to prepare for the conversation in advance, and the application of compassionate communication techniques. When a conversation is unplanned, we share strategies to shift the conversation to a planned time in order to prepare, the use of diffusers, how to ensure they know they are being heard, and how to end the conversation if it turns abusive towards you or someone you support.

Engagement strategy and Process
Real life examples shared throughout from two practitioners
The use of a fun, fast paced approach with a good dose of humor
Peer-to-Peer interaction examining scenarios and selecting strategies discussed for each set of circumstances.

Supporting research

Nonviolent Communication by Marshall Rosenburg
Dare to Lead by Brene Brown
Supercommunicators by Charles Duhigg
Crucial Conversations: Tools for talking when the stakes are high by J. Granny, A. Switzler, K Patterson & R. McMillian
Speed of Trust by Stephen M.R. Covey
Learning Focused Supervision by Bruce M. Wellman and Laura Lipton
Love Languages in the Workplace by Gary Chapman and Dr. Paul White
Culturize by Jimmy Casas
Good to Great by Jim Collins
The Advantage: Why Organizational Health Trumps Everything else in buisness by Patrick Lencioni
Dealing with Difficult Teachers by Todd Whitiker